When I was a little girl, I
never understood why my mom would go grocery shopping alone, without my three
siblings and me. Now that I am a mother, I get it. Nevertheless, I recently
found myself at the grocery store early in the morning with my own three small
children. I have a four-year-old son and twins who at that time were one year
old. I was optimistically believing that God would work a miracle and no crises
would occur.
We’d gotten home from a long
road trip late the night before, and we badly needed groceries. Hygiene hadn’t
really been our top priority that morning. No one’s teeth or hair had been
brushed, and my two sons, Asher and Abel, were still in their pajamas. None of
the kids were wearing shoes. My one-year-old daughter Nora was wearing a skirt
with no tights underneath. Besides the excellent front view of her diaper that
this provided for all other shoppers, her outfit also showcased the magic
marker masterpiece she had drawn on her legs in the car the night before, when
my husband and I were too tired to care what the kids were doing, so long as
they were quiet.
The kids were exhausted, and
were crying their way through the store when an elderly couple approached us.
The wife, holding her walker in front of her, immediately began talking to
Nora, telling her what a pretty girl she was. The husband took on the boys,
trying to guess their names, stealing their noses, pulling things out of their
ears, and confusing them just enough to distract them from their crying. The
couple returned to their shopping only when my children were calmed, telling me
again how beautiful my children were (despite the fact that on that morning
they looked homeless).
This interaction was enough
to get me through the rest of the shopping trip, even the part where my
four-year-old son Asher had a bathroom emergency right as I was checking out. I
had to leave my full cart unmanned, carry my screaming twins inside the
bathroom, let them stand barefoot in a public bathroom in order to help Asher
get on the potty, yank Nora’s hands out of the potty, wash all hands, make a
mental note to wash all children in a sanitizing bath at home, all while
avoiding eye contact with anyone, so I wouldn’t have to see their looks of
alarm. The gentle, unspoken blessing of the sweet older couple allowed me to
swallow my screams in that moment and instead respond with soft-spoken horror,
making the best of yet another insane moment with my three littles.
To those of you whose
children are raised – whether you are a new or veteran empty-nester, whether
you are retired or still working, whether you are bored or busy – we need you!
You are needed in the church, needed in the grocery store, needed in the homes
of your children and grandchildren. Seeing you reminds those of us who are still
in the trenches of child-rearing that there is life ahead of us, and that the
life we are currently living is a blessing and not a curse. Your approval, your
blessing - they are life to us. Your ability to look past our mess and see the
beauty beneath teaches us to do the same. Your cheesy jokes, gentle words, and
chatty observations about the weather take our minds off of how crazy we must
look and make us feel human again. You remind us that we are not alone, but are
just one part of God’s huge family.
Note: This blog originally appeared as an article at openbiblemessage.org
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